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10. limited edition Hosty Duo Kazoo, for all my kazooing needs
9. 17 flavors of lip gloss, ’cause a girl needs options
8. dynamic microphone, in case just singing in public isn’t enough
7. ink pens that don’t work, so no one ever asks to borrow any pens
6. puppy treats, for rewarding puppies for being so cute
5. three to-do lists, one for school, one for work, one for home!
4. one “I Love Lucy” Altoids tin of paper clips, for paper-clipping
3. green tea bags, because I really like green tea
2. knitting needles + yarn, it’s like a weapon and a hobby in one!
1. camera, for taking pictures of illegally parked tomatoes

10. buy 100 shares of Bear-Stearns
9. purchase Dolf de Roos’ “Insider’s Guide to Recession-Proofing Your Life” kit
8. spend 15 minutes with an Emperor’s Club VIP girl
7. upgrade your entertainment center with Japanese electronics
6. start converting your money to the euro
5. buy 100 cups of $3.00 coffee in an attempt to reach nirvana, a la Philip J. Fry
4. gamble that shit!
3. start the process of immigrating to Mexico
2. have the greatest booze and coke bender of your entire life
1. do your part to reduce national debt and mail it to the Chinese