First off, shout-out to Josef & Lamar, who I’ve been meaning to mention for quite some time! Hi guys, hope you’re having a fantastic day!
I’m a big fan of lists. I keep a running list of things that need to be done, like writing papers or taking out the trash. I also keep a list of the CDs I want, books I should read, movies I’d like to watch, and road-trips I need to take. Lately, I’ve been putting a lot of things on my to-do list; partly because it’s the end of the year and there are a lot of things to do, and partly because there are a few things I believe everyone should do while they are in college. And I’d really like to do most of those things while I’m here at OSU.
List of Things Everyone Should Do While Attending OSU:
1) Get a ticket from the parking Nazis. If you’re going to make fun of them anyway, you might as well get one of their ridiculous tickets to add fuel to the fire. I received my first parking ticket last Tuesday, “parking in a restricted area.” My argument: we’re allowed to park anywhere on campus after 5:00, right? Shouldn’t sidewalks be included?
2) Ride in the Edmon Lowe Library’s elevator. You will gain a new appreciation for the elevators in every other building on campus; even the elevators in Willham will seem brand-spanking new compared the library’s elevator a la 1920. You might feel the need to pray or confess before you get on, and that’s OK.
3) Speaking of the library, everyone should stay there one weeknight until they close at 2 a.m. It is kind of freaky when they turn on the ancient PA system to tell everyone 20 times that the library is closing in 20 minutes. And stay out of the basement.
4) No matter what your background, go to The Tumbleweed on Thursday night. For the best results, take a few shots or down a few beers before heading over there. You’ll see people that swore they’d never go, and they’ll probably be drunk too. If you’re a country fan, walk into Tremors. If you’re of the rap & rock variety, mosey on over to the ‘Weed. I was in complete culture shock the first time I went out there (yes, I’ve been more than once).
5) After your enchanting evening at the ‘Weed, drive (or have someone take you) to Shortcake’s Diner. It’s open 24-hours and is home to some of the best food a drunk person could ask for at 2:30 a.m. Check out Shortcake’s on the Orange Pages to see what I’m talking about.
6) Do something recreational at Boomer Lake. Try to run the three-plus miles around it, or take your bike, skates, dog, whatever. They’ve also got a Frisbee golf course; and I’ve seen people fishing there a few times. One of these days, I think I’ll try to swim across it.
7) Visit every bar and business on the Strip. Donate plasma for money, then skip over to JR’s, the Wormy Dog, or The Third Place and spend your blood money on beer or coffee. Enough said.
List of Things To Do Before You Graduate College:
1) Write a paper for money. It may take some time, but it’ll make you feel intelligent because A) someone thinks you’re smart enough to write their paper and B) someone is dumb enough to pay <I>you</I> to write their paper.
2) Wait until the last minute to complete a project or paper or to study for a test. There’s nothing like a healthy dose of procrastination to boost your self-esteem (assuming of course that you finish what you started, and you get a decent a grade). Why not pull an all-nighter while you’re at it? There’s nothing quite like watching the sun come up 9+ hours after you watched it go down.
3) Fail the test/project/paper you studied/worked on/wrote all night. That’ll teach you to procrastinate, won’t it?
4) Go to a school outside of your home state. Even if you only go for a semester, you’ll get a better perspective on things and possibly a better appreciation of your education. The point is to experience something different than what you’re comfortable with – it will make you a stronger person in the long run.
5) Change things up a little. If you’ve been coupled-up with someone for quite some time, try being single a few months. If the reverse is true, getcha a boy or girlfriend; but make sure you set some standards before you tie one down.
6) Be a DD/require a DD at least once. You can have a lot of fun pulling pranks on drunken people (“Oh Shit! We’re out of gas again. Ante up.”). Or if it’s your turn to drink, think of all the entertainment you’re providing your unfortunately sober friend(s). What could it hurt? You’re drunk and you won’t remember anyway.
Things Everyone Should Do:
1) Eat sushi, but enjoy anything barbecued. Cook your own dinner and eat it even if you burned it to hell. Wake up early on a Saturday and make breakfast from scratch; follow it up with cartoons.
2) Go to church somewhere different. You’ll learn about a different religion, and hopefully understand your own better.
3) Learn to play an instrument. I’m not sure why this is a good thing, but it is so just go with it.
4) Become fluent in another language, but only after you learn to read, write, and speak English well.
5) Go fishing, hunting, camping, and horseback riding. Also, go to a play/theatrical production, read an entire book series, collect coins or stamps or something, and eat at a black tie only restaurant.
6) Play a sport you don’t like once, and never cease to play the sports you do like. Pick a favorite sports team and follow them religiously.
7) Visit another country. Actually visit several countries. And take a plane, train, bus, and covered wagon at some point in your travels.
8) Take a road trip with your friends, but travel by yourself sometime too.
Sometime, I’ll publish my list of Jackass Things To Do. But only after I’ve completed more than half of them. I’m actually almost there…